Aussie Sickness

Right where to start, i think this could be my longest post for a long time if i chuck hand histories in.

Busted in 6th, sounds crap but basically ive just played my best ever live poker for 5 hours without a doubt. Nothing prior to this game in my whole career comes close, i know i was in the zone for so long but the blind structure just killed me in the end.

At this minute in time i feel inconsolable and so low i still do wonder if i have it in myself to handle the ups and downs in poker in the long haul. The "play out of your skin" for no reward kills me and i just feel sick. Sicker than WSOP bust 2006, sicker than WSOP bust 2007, sicker than CPC deep bust 2005.

OK on to hands, will list as many as i can handle, hopefully this will help me get some of this negative stuff out of my head cos i know there are so many postives to be taken deep down.

10,000 starting stack
50/100

1st hand, im dealt KK in the sb (highest hand of tournament) and make it 900 after several limpers as im not too bothered about action and want to set a image immediately anyway and all fold.

No i cant do this, there are too many hands and its just pissing me off trying to think of them cos im tired.

Lets generalise and maybe i will list key pots and list some more in another post. Basically everyone at the table (except myself) looked terrified and nervous in my opinion pretty much the whole game. The table was ridiculously tight with exception of the 1 italian who bust first as expected really. The more everyone tightened up the more i raised with complete junk, not even linked stuff often and got the majority through.

OK straight to the sickest pot of all, i have good image from above and we are on level 200/400 50 ante. Ive just raised from button with AK (had 2 times all game) and im now in the hijack 2 hands later with 10s (2nd biggest hand all game) and make it 1400. Allin for about 3700 more and i call. its his KQ vs my 10s but i dont hold and im mad, on tilt, gutted, annoyed, livid and plenty more.

At that time i was probably joint chip leader on about 22,000 and the pot would have took me to 30,000 (30% of chips in play) with 6 players left on a v v v tight table with a great payout structure to justify stealing beyond belief and of course it wasnt a crapshoot at that point.

It took me a while to calm down after that and despite being stacked on still just over average chips circa 18k it just seemed to go wrong after that. A couple of reraises of missed flops pots lost and stuff like that really. Made a good laydown with 8s after being priced in ridiculously preflop reraised and seeing a 9 high flop i eventually got a confident tell at which point i immediately mucked to be shown QQ.

Again reraised (by genuine hands 100% im sure) a couple times and with the blinds going up i become crippled. Playing only 7,000 at 600/1200 in the big blind i get the clearest tell ive seen all game. Folds to sb big stack and he pauses and i know he is weak as can be, then he moves in. Obviously it wasnt just the pause that gave me this his facial expression was def part too and previous strong hands pots he played info i had. Anyway im lookin for anything to gamble with and prob would called queen high here, likely J10 , maybe J9 so im praying for sommat like that. First card is 4h and 2nd is Ah and i make an immediate call on seeing the ace to be shown 9,10off. Its the first time im allin and in trouble for my life but i hold and get back to 15k.

Again sustain that then blinds go up again and its a ridiculous 3600 a round at 800/1600 with 200 ante. AJ runs into AQ which he took ages to call with and i bust out in 6th. Pot would have put me on over 30,000 with 5 left so again was huge and i knew how much it meant to me but no help came and i went into this instant depressive mood.

Absolutely no way i could watch the last 5 play out. to be honest they are all nice people but i couldnt care less who wins once i had gone.

One blind out merchant (the AQ) had probably survived at least 3 allins prior to that point and it just left me sick knowing how much luck just didnt go my way when i only needed such a smaller chunk compared to most of the other players. In all honesty if that STT played out 100 times i would expect to win it 20-25% of the time which is just a plain ridiculous statement to make but i know its true !

OK dunno what im doin now but im done on here for now. Try to fast forward in aussie millions mode where 20,000 chips with the same blind structure but an hour clock will be juicy and fun to say the least. I cant face the $1,150 supersatellite in 20 minutes as im flamin knackered and may hav a snooze for an hour or 2 to see if that makes me feel any better.

Note to self:

Poker is a sick sick sick game, get some luck for a change in a big event and who knows what can happen but for now its sick sick sick.

:((

Note to readers:

Comment on above if u want but i dont want "ul comments" so aint gonna post anything of that nature on here.